Hello! It’s been a while – There’s been a lot of change but I might write things again soon. In the meantime, I popped on Bailrigg FM for Talk of the Devil today. It was extremely fun to record with LUCI again and it all got very silly. Enjoy!
Author: Lawrence Cook
Victoria Wood
It’s only April, and 2016 has already cruelly taken away so many talented and influential people: David Bowie, Ronnie Corbett, Alan Rickman, Prince, Harper Lee and Glenn Frey to name but a few, but the news that made me most sad was the passing of Victoria Wood. Continue reading
Dear Diary… Dentapocalypse
I’ve just started watching the walking dead, 6 years late, I know. It is a great show, season 1 has been very enjoyable but something has been bugging me.
There’s been a zombie apocalypse and yet everyone still has great teeth. I’m not sure how long they’ve been surviving and whatnot but surely they’re not galavanting off away from these zombies whilst observing a sufficient dental hygiene routine. Do they have floss in a zombie apocalypse? There’s been no mention so far of anyone brushing their teeth and there certainly isn’t a dentist among the band of merry survivors.
I suppose they’re all actors.
It is a good show though.
The Jump
Whilst this is not in my normal style, I feel a point should be made. I think the TV gameshow The Jump should be cancelled, the sheer volume of celebrities quitting the show after some very serious injuries is unacceptable. 7 out of the 12 contestants have been injured, hospitalised or forced to quit, Beth Tweddle had to have neck surgery, Ola Jordan suffered a horrible leg injury. A number of people have spoken out on social media already and Channel 4 reportedly have asked producers to review safety procedures. I don’t think that’s good enough; the level of danger is inexcusable. Surely someone thought that maybe this wasn’t the best idea for a gameshow? Please, cancel the show before something worse happens.
Dear Diary… Bedsheets
I am a great advocate of breakfast in bed. The sad part is that I have to prepare it for myself, then go back to bed and serve it to myself. I’m not a messy eater, but sometimes I spill things. There was jam in my bed today. I had to change my bedsheets. It’s hard being an adult.
2015 – A Review
The end of 2015 is upon us, and the time is nigh to look back at some of the happenings of this year, ere is it forgotten. 2015 was the year of dresses, of fracas, and of baking, and by Jove, it was a good one.
Dear Diary… Space Sex
Has anyone ever had sex in space? It must get lonely up there on the international space station, what with all the space and whatnot. They could start a ‘light-year high’ club. One small thrust for man…
Ground Control to Major Tim
There’s a #BritInSpace, and as far as I could see, he didn’t shit himself on the way up. Because that’s what would have worried me the most about the whole thing, not the lack of gravity, or the endless abyss of space, but soiling yourself from both ends live on the BBC.
Dear Diary… Big Darts Theory
I was watching the big bang theory earlier, and I noticed that there’s a dartboard on the back of the front door in Leonard and Sheldon’s apartment. This is odd because I’m sure they don’t use it at all during the show, nor is there any mention of it. I quite like darts, but maybe theoretical physicists don’t tend to take it up as a hobby, even though they have the facilities available. Maybe we should thank them for not playing though, I don’t imagine Penny would appreciate a dart in the eye.
Dear Diary… Lemons
I saw a poster today that said “When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone’s eye.” Personally, I don’t think this behaviour is conducive to solving our socio-economic issues, taking your problems and squeezing them into the eyes of thy neighbour. Cameron’s Britain. And if anything, life is a concept, and probably has no actual way of bestowing citrus fruit on anyone.
Also, does this interfere with the mantra of “Keep Calm and Carry On”? If I’m to receive lemons, should I still remain calm or would this be the time to panic? Can I possibly carry on if my eyes have been assaulted with someone else’s lemons?
What happened to making lemonade and selling it for 50 cents on your driveway? You’ve changed.
The Daily Spittoon 